Let us face it — when you are 20, bouncing back from a late night is practically a sport. You wake up after hours of dubious cocktails and questionable decisions, and somehow, you glow. By the time you hit 30, though, the game changes: fun has a cost, and that cost includes eye bags, a complexion in more shades than you care to name, and a deep-seated need for sleep that somehow never arrives. But fear not! While you cannot turn back the clock, you can (try to) bluff your way through it with these post-party survival hacks.
Here is a radical suggestion: lower your standards. I know — not exactly what you were hoping for, but either you went hard or you went home early. Do not hate yourself for looking a bit more rumpled than usual. The only person expecting you to be picture-perfect is you, and they will get over it. This is your time to hide behind sunglasses, strategically turn off your camera during Zoom calls, and luxuriate in a dark room until your head stops throbbing. Give yourself permission to look like you had fun. You earned it.
Hydrate like it is your job
If you only do one thing, let it be water. More specifically, litres of it. Ideally, start chugging during the party, but if that ship has sailed, drink up before bed. Yes, you might end up puffy in the morning, but it is worth it. Keep a bottle by the bed for easy access, try a cooling, hydrating mask to rescue your skin. If anyone asks why you are wearing a cold, slimy mask at breakfast, tell them you are handling the consequences of a great night with grace.
Embrace the early bird partying
If you can possibly control this — and I admit, it is not always possible — start your partying earlier. Think of it as shifting your personal party time zone. If you can hit bed by midnight, your face might actually look like it belongs to a living human come morning. And the bonus? You can enjoy some coffee without your insides shrivelling up from dehydration.
Booking a sauna session or running a hot bath might feel indulgent, but let us be real, your body needs all the help it can get. Sweat out whatever cocktails you took, let the hot water soothe your dance-worn muscles, and dive into a mini detox, washing last night away.
Try lymphatic drainage gadgets
Once the idea of rubbing a cold jade stone over your face would have sounded ridiculous, but desperate times call for desperate measures. Lymphatic drainage is your friend here — gua sha tools, jade rollers, microcurrent devices, or even the whole-leg massager if you are really committed. Not only do they help with puffiness, but they give you an excuse to lie down for ten extra minutes in the name of “self-care.”
Absorbents might be your ally
Now, let us be clear — this is not medical advice, I am talking solely about my personal experience. But I can tell you, a bit of activated charcoal or any other absorbent used to make a world of difference for me.
It might sound counterintuitive, but marathon sleep sessions rarely leave you feeling any better. After a night of partying, five or six hours might actually help you shake off the fog faster than 10 or 12 would. Overdoing sleep tends to leave you groggy, puffy, and feeling like a hibernating bear that has woken up too soon. Keep it reasonable and remember: it is a hangover, not a coma.
Missing out on the coolest events in Dubai? We know where you’ll be in November: The Crowd Test Festival — the very first Art and Music Festival by The Sandy Times.
The lineup is incredible: Mainline Magic Orchestra from Spain, Eden Burns from New Zealand, and a lot of your favourite DJs like Hani J, Hassan Alwan, Bazzzuk, and more.
Mark your calendar, snag your tickets, and get ready: November 16, 2024, from 5 PM to 3 AM at Monkey Bar, Dubai.
Tickets are available
here